Then some stuff came up with a good friend and i quit my job and life was feeling really chaotic. It is easy to want to fall back into a comfortable pattern...
Around that time Sean started texting me long messages that alternated between how much he loves and misses me and how i am a filthy lying whore with no soul.
That fucked my shit up. In the last few days i have come to realize that his issues are separate from me. That i am not causing this, that desperation is NOT the equivalent of love. That our relationship was awful before and it would be again.
That Sean is fucking with my head.
Thankfully, in ny new -found maturity, i am choosing to express my overwhelming rage at the gym rather than at the bar.
Perhaps i will one day be able to add temperance to my virtues. But probably not!
Anyway, i have a new job that i am much happier with. I am establishing new friendships that exist outside the framework of a relationship for the first time. My aforementioned friend issue has come to a head and i think resolved.
I have lost 10 lbs and am working hard to continue losing... Have a training regime in the gym that leaves me sore and satisfied every day.
The business is making good progress. Life is fucking solid right now.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.3